At 11pm, I fall, literally, into bed after my first weeknight yoga teacher training class. Last Saturday I was spent by the end of class; and I had started fresh in the morning. Tonight's class started at 5:30pm, and I had been up since 5:30am and had a full work day. My body feels wiped out. I can barely type. My turn to teach the series we were learning that night was at 9:50 pm. I am normally asleep by this hour. I felt guilty for being so tired, and that my fellow classmates had to suffer through my sleepy teaching series. I was so exhausted, I could barely stand at the front of the room, much less command it, sound energetic, or even think clearly. I did not do well. But, I did it.
Did I eat enough food today? No. Did I drink enough water today? No. I try to avoid caffeine most of the time, but I am wondering if I should reconsider that. Part of our training is doing different yoga classes, as well as learning how to teach. I took a new yoga class for me today, Prana Flow just before training. I didn't know what to expect, which was a good thing, or I would have been aprehensive. It was harder than I thought, hotter than I anticipated, and more strenuous than I expected. I was wiped out after the class and ready to go home and go to bed. And I had 4 hours of yoga training class ahead of me. Coffee anyone? As I am sitting in bed writing this, my dog is sprawled on the futon couch in our bedroom. He looks like I feel - dog tired.
Normally yoga energizes me. Normal is 60-90 minutes of yoga. 5 hours of yoga is whole 'nother deal. I can't even remember the last time by body felt this empty, weak, spent. Maybe after a long weekend in college? Clearly I need to be doing something differently. I am 4 days in and barely functioning!
I begin to question my decision. What have I done? What have I gotten myself into? Am I too old for this? If I am going to be this exhausted every day, how I am going to do class, learn, and expect to work and take care of my family?
I wake up the next morning sore, really sore. Hamstrings, ouch. Shoulders, chest and triceps, ouch. Dozens of sun salutations will do that. I am clearly dehydrated, and realizing I did not eat enough calories the day before, and am so tired I feel like I am in some sort of trance. I remain this way all day. This is not good. After a full day of work and parent teacher conferences, I can barely complete a sentence. I vow to drink more water, take my vitamins, eat more frequently and more protein and calories and spread my practice and training out a bit for a few days until I break through this inital wall. I am used to working out. I work out at least 3 days a week lifting weights, attending yoga, doing cardio, hiking, something I thought I was in decent shape......not. Again, I wonder, am I too old for this? No is the first word that comes to mind.
The first hot yoga class I ever took was 13 years ago from a woman in her 50s. She looked like she was 35, and was in spectacular physical shape. I remember being in awe of her body and presence. I can do this, I told myself. I CAN DO THIS!
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